Man	: 	Is this seat empty?
Woman	: 	Yes, and so do this one if you sit down. 

x		x		x		x

Doctor  : I have some bad news and some very bad news.
Patient : Well, might as well give me the bad news first.
Doctor  : The lab called with your test results. They said you have 24 hours to live.
Patient : 24 hours! That's terrible!! What could be worse? What's the very bad news?
Doctor  : I've been trying to reach you since yesterday.

x		x		x		x

Patient : How much to have this tooth pulled?
Dentist : $90.00.
Patient : $90.00 for just a few minutes work???
Dentist : I can extract it very slowly if you like.

x		x		x		x

A new prisoner comes to prison cell.

Convicts: 	What has happened with you that makes you here?
Prisoner: 	I have broken a window on my job place.
Convicts: 	It's unbelievable! How can they put you here for such a small
		case? Where did you work?
Prisoner: 	A submarine.